To become mentally resilient you don’t have to do all that much. It seems like a big task to become mentally strong but most of the qualities can be summarized in 3 aspects that have been known for decades.
Mentally strong people are people that are not phased by things happening around them and know how to handle the few things that do phase them. They are people we can rely on when worse comes to worse and are people that will do what they say they will.
They laugh at themselves because their self-confidence and sense of self-worth comes from a much deeper place and isn’t tied to anything outside of them. That all being said, here are the 3 main aspects.
1. They are comfortable with Death. By comfortable I do not mean they invite it in or necessary like it, but mentally strong people have dealt with death and made their own conclusions regarding death.
Some of them have experienced death through others, but most of them have been very close to their own death in one way or another.
This being okay with death as a part of life allows them to be afraid of much less things. When death is not this big, scary monster anymore a lot of things lose their fear factor.
The fear of failure, fear of loss and fear of purpose all become manageable and addressable problems rather than unsolvable fears.
Due to this, mentally strong people are able to look at situations from a calmer standpoint and address problems for what they are.
To learn this quality you must make your peace with the fact that death exists. This is something all of us should go through at one point or another, whereas most people chose to do this very late in life.
Nothing is permanent, therefore, you get to chose whatever you do. Death is not a scary end of all things. It might be the start of something new, or the doorway to a new world, or an experience unlike anything we have had before. In any case, it is an adventure we all must go on sooner or later, so get your fears out of the way now.
2. They know how to distance themselves from situations. If you see a mentally strong person go up to a random person in a bar and hit on them with a cheesy pick-up line you can be sure they will not even be phased when they get a face full of whatever drink was standing next to the person at the time.
Mentally strong people can distance themselves from the emotions others bring in and can chose to bring in their own emotions if it aids the situation.
They picked up this ability from being able to draw their self-confidence and value from a place that is untouchable by anything that happens on the outside.
They are able to laugh at themselves, are able to look past most things and take nothing serious unless they chose to
Most of these people boost their self-confidence with daily achievements, which builds up such a big barrier that no matter what happens to them, their self-confidence will only get slightly scratched at worst.
Writing down 3 achievements that made you feel great today is the first step in being able to not get involved emotionally in situations. The second step is to practice Gratitude for everything you already have.
This puts your focus on everything that is working for you instead of everything that could shatter your confidence. However, following these two steps daily is a must.
3. The last and most important quality mentally strong people have is integrity.Being able to put full trust in your own abilities is a key to mental strength.
Imagine how many more problems would be solvable and completely harmless if you just knew, deep down inside, that you could handle them. That no matter what happened, you would figure it out.
This strength, in addition to being able to always do what they said they would is the unquestioned biggest strength. Most of us fail at this second part without a second thought.
We do not do what we said we would, do not stick to our goals, and therefore lose security, comfort and trust when it comes to anything we say.
We do not even believe our own words anymore because we surrendered on so many of our goals, whereas mentally strong people know that what they say will come true. Because if it doesn’t come true on its own, they will make it.
This unswerving conviction in their own abilities and in everything they say makes them trust themselves fully and without a doubt.
You know how great of a feeling it is to be able to completely put your trust in someone else’s hands. Now think about having that feeling 24/7 because that other person is you!
And then imagine doing something as simple as going up to a person at a bar and hitting on them with a stupid pick-up line… When you trust yourself, believe in yourself and know, for a fact, that you can get everything you want, then it doesn’t matter how that person will react whatsoever.
To obtain this ability for yourself you muststart following through with the things you say. If you want something, go get it, and don’t quit until you do. If you make a New Year’s Resolution, see it through to the end. And if you give someone a promise, lose on sleep, food and water rather than to break your promise.
In doing so you will put all the self-confidence and self-worth in yourself, which makes it an unbreakable cycle of constantly reinforcing yourself. No one will be able to touch it, you will be able to do everything you said you would and will be one of the mentally strongest people on the planet.